As I set foot in the Vatican, I was possessed by its energies and the chills that hovered over me. I am a woman who has lived long enough to defy what my eyes lay upon and spiral into my own black hole of words, but at that moment I was silence personified. My eyes widened with the dimensions of the building and my heart skipped beats. It was such a calm moment for me. I actually felt in synch with God, and in harmony with every individual that surrounded me. 

 

I held my father's hand tightly and we walked through the vast entrance. We gave each other one single look and I will never forget how his eyes scintillated at that moment. The first words we exchanged were actually when we stood beyond the "The School of Athens". We both analyzed the technique of the piece and the meaning behind every stroke. My father is an intelligent and interested man who takes art, culture, and philosophy to heart so his words were the life buoy I needed to be pull me out of my own spiral of words. One thing I will never forget, was the way he pointed out how Raffaello used the idea of direction to portray such in-depth and meaningful messages. In the center of the mural, Plato looks at me pointing upwards and  his ideology and philosophy are disposed right before me, the point of his finger whispers into my ear how everything we see around us is just a shadow that darkens the reality of how things remain unchanged. Plato believed that beauty and goodness were an infinite constant of life. The book that points upwards is called "Timaeus" and it's just an extension of his personality and beliefs. I admired Plato. So much so, that the mute language of art was now my mother language. Plato seeks for good and somewhat reflects a small part of me that wishes that happiness and goodness was a guarantee rather than a wish. As a child, every time I blew out my birthday candles, like Plato I wished for peace in the world, happiness across the world but as years passed by, it was hard to live in Philosophies. Yet, we live in different times and his visions and worries were specialized to his time. In his time being homosexual wasn't an issue however our generation can still remember the time when feeling any attraction for the same sex was immoral, and being a woman was a sin. We live in different worlds and goodness has different definitions in every single year since the creation of the universe. Plato's philosophies and strokes are a second language to all of us. We are all just trying to make sense of. It's a temporal language that gives its students room for interpretations. 

 

I started to zone off, and Aristotle winks at me, pulling me back to his hands that are drifting into the depth with the help of gravity. The downwards action is nothing but our own experience. He almost points to himself, moaning with his body that he is living his own life, walking his own path, and writing his own story. The extension following his body is "Aristotle's Ethics" and it serves as a symbol for the significance of education, justice, and friendship present in the physical world.

These two philosophers put forth rather contrasting ideologies, however, they walk in harmony and are seen side by side. No one is put on a pedestal. Not even Philosophers. As I thought about this idea of equality and questioned the "why" behind this sweet and sour combination of religion and philosophy, I understood that although there are differences, they comfort each other and push one and another to limits. Soon I understood that both concepts are established on a basis of belief. Religion is a broad and general understanding of values, principles, and morals that are used as a recipe for life. However, philosophy tackles a greater scale. It dives into scientific and mathematical concepts such as knowledge and metaphysics. It attempts to find the truth about the physical world but religion opts for the idea of the supernatural. Although they differ in some areas, their structure and foundation are identical. How different are they? Is religion considered philosophy? Is philosophy considered a religion? All these questions are rich, yet there will never be a concrete answer to them and certainly no currency the human kind can corrupt.

 

In this moment I realized that I wasn't looking directly at both of them stamped on the wall, but I was still looking at my father's gaze, and analyzing the reflection of his eyes. Through his eyes, and through the hold of his hand I felt that as long as I had him by my side I would be at peace. He was the glasses I need to enlighten the world and restore the birthday wishes I once blew out my candles with. He made me trust that I'll walk my own journey and I will always trust in the goodness of people like Plato does. I looked around and everyone was alone wondering the halls, no hands connected, no gazes exchanged and certainly no other young girls protected by their father. I will never have to cancel out my father's thoughts, votes, feelings. I'll need to hold them closely to my heart. And that's a feeling that one in a million girls get. My father is the "once in a blue moon" dad that all men dream to be, all wives wish to find and all girls wish to have. If anything, he is the moon that brightens the darkness of the night, and brightens my spiral of words.