Erin Beckett wasn't scared of most things. She loved roller coasters, she was the designated bug killer at home even with three older brothers. When the offense of the other team came speeding toward her in the goal, she flexed her gloved hands and was ready for anything. Erin considered herself to be very brave.

 

But she did not mess around with ghosts. The 'Great Beyond' was none of her business.

 

The only comforting thing about losing her high school teammate that past spring was the thought that she was safely on the other side. Probably doing heavenly soccer drills, knowing Meg. The idea that she could be stuck in this dimension, lurking around any corner, alone? That was scarier than any urban legend her college teammates could drag her into.

 

Still, she followed them up the fire escape of the Weston Center. It was a bonding tradition to pay respects to the ghosts that tread the creaky floors of the gymnasium turned dance facility on the October full moon. Erin couldn't fight decades of history. But she refused to let her teammates know she was scared. They were undefeated in the conference because of her goalkeeping, unheard of for a freshman. She was the Great Brick Wall. She couldn't let them see the cracks.

 

A midfielder shouldered the door open and the team spilled into the echoey room. They dispersed in the darkness, chatting and giggling. Erin shivered as she closed the door behind her.

 

"Guys? We're not alone," Captain Riley called out. 

 

Erin just about jumped out of her skin.

 

"The dance department is here too." 

 

Oh. Right.

 

Erin couldn't see Riley, but she could hear steps getting closer. Maybe she was coming over to suggest that they should leave, making the captainly decision to move this ritual to the safety of her apartment. 

Erin pulled out her phone flashlight, expecting to see Riley's blunt bob. Instead, she was met with-

 

"Funny seeing you here," her roommate squeaked. Faith Perkins' hazel eyes were wide and unblinking. She looked like a baby deer.

 

It's not that Erin didn't like Faith. She actually liked her best out of the girls in their quad dorm, though this wasn't a high bar to clear. Her first impressions of the other two were "too whiny," and "high-maintenance." Faith was not whiny nor hard to maintain, just a little... awkward? 

 

Erin studied her least-least-favorite cohabitator in the harsh blue shine of her flashlight. Her hair was slicked back in a bun that looked more like a helmet. She was wearing a leotard with sweatpants over the top, which made this the first time Erin hadn't seen her in a T-shirt three sizes too big for her from her parents' mission trips. 

 

She cleared her throat. "I didn't know you danced."

"You never asked," Faith said with a shrug. She didn't say it with any malice, but it spread a layer of guilt on top of Erin's terror. She really didn't know anything about her third roommate. She spent so much time being annoyed at the other two or scurrying out of the dorm for early morning weight room time that she never had the time to talk to her.

 

Or maybe she did have the time and was just trying to make herself feel better about being a bad roommate.

 

"So, are you guys doing some bonding ritual too?" she asked. 

"Yeah. The fall ballet is Giselle, and she becomes a ghost. Someone heard a rumor-" (maybe this soccer tradition wasn't all that secret after all) "that you guys sneak in here every year to do a seance-" (why did she have to say seance?) "and they wanted to join the party." 

"Trust me, you can take my spot at the party any time," Erin tried to joke.

"There's no reason to be scared of the dark," Faith said, blunt as ever. 

That was one thing that Erin could say she definitively liked about her, she did not mince words. When the guys across the hall were blasting music at 2am, Faith knocked on the door and asked why they were ‘so obnoxious.' 

 

"No, it's more the, uh, seance part," Erin clarified, "I'm fine with the dark. It's just them making us commune with a guy who supposedly got his head knocked off with a basketball. They're convinced he's why they converted the building from a gymnasium-"

"My dance friends said our ghost grand jete-d too high and landed straight in the ghostly dimension. There's lots of lore."

"That does not make me feel better."

"Why?"

"Why would it?!"

 

"Yo, Wall, get over here!" Captain Riley called from across the room. Erin put down her phone, it would be easier to sneak back down the fire escape without her flashlight on.

"What did she call you?" Faith asked, seemingly unphased by the sudden darkness. 

"The Wall. It's a soccer thing. I don't let the other team get to me."

"But ghosts get to you." It wasn't a question. The window behind Faith gave the illusion that the moon was sitting gently on her shoulder, ever in control.

 

"I'm not scared of ghosts," Erin said a little more aggressively than the statement probably deserved.

"But you said that you didn't like the idea of trying to talk to-"

"I just don't think it's a good idea to go poking around in the other side's business. She's gone, let her rest." Erin felt a hot flush creeping up her neck. It was a good thing she turned off the flashlight.

 

"I thought you said it was a he."

"What?"

"The basketball player ghost."

"That's what I said."

"No, it's-"

"I need to go," Erin started shuffling towards her teammates, the ancient hardwood floor crying out with every step.

 

Faith somehow caught the crook of Erin's elbow. Forget Bambi eyes, she had to be something that could see in the dark. Maybe an owl.

"Who died?"

Erin scoffed. "What?"

"Who died that you actually don't want to think about? It's not the basketball guy." Blunt, honest Faith. Faith, who could see in the dark and right through her, apparently. 

 

It's not that Erin didn't want to think about Meg. It's that she was always thinking about her. 

To her, grief was like the guys across the hall blasting the music too late at night. The thought was always there, the volume was just louder at some times than others.

 

And who was there to mess with the volume then, and who was messing with it now? Faith Perkins.

 

"My old teammate. In a car accident."

"I'm sorry. I didn't know."

"You never asked," Erin echoed the sentence from moments earlier.

 

Faith let go of her elbow and said (not asked), "Your team doesn't know."

"No. And I don't want them to."

"Okay."

"And I don't want to talk about it."

"Right now? Or ever?" Faith's voice was quiet.

"Right now," Erin replied. She couldn't tell if it was the truth or not. She disappeared into the darkness before she could decide. 

 

She found her teammates, who had arranged themselves in a circle. Riley held out a Ouija board, her beaming face hollowed out by the flickering candles in the center of the formation.

"Our fearless Wall, finally! Will you do the honors?"

Erin looked over her shoulder, trying to make out Faith amidst the cluster of dancers on the other side of the room. She couldn't find her.

 

The strangest part of all? Meg loved ghost stories. She told them as she braided Erin's hair for tournaments. She'd try to spook her on the bus back from away games, the blue moon hanging overhead. 

 

She gave horror movie recommendations as she practiced shots on goal, with Erin diving to block them. The skills from two-person practices were what sealed their state championship win and her scholarship. Meg was the only reason Erin was any good at soccer, the only reason she was The Wall.

 

And now, Meg was the reason The Wall was quietly crumbling.

 

"Yeah, sure. Gimme the board."