In college, I went on a date with the son of my mother’s coworker. I couldn’t remember if his name was Jason or Justin, so I spent the entire night maneuvering my way out of saying his name. He... [+]
Later that night, I heard a crash from somewhere in my room, my eyes opening almost immently. I looked around and saw my closest door was open, and Midnight had knocked over my emotion jars. I yelled at her, shaming her, but she just walked away like the diva she is. I felt a hot ache in my belly, seeping into my head. I stumbled back at this strange feeling. Was this....was this anger? I had never felt it before. Suddenly, something hot started streaming down my face at the thought of people finding out about it. I wiped my face finding only water. Are these tears? I had never cried before either. I looked around, feeling something light and my mouth curve at a specific picture. This was happiness I think it was called. I looked at other things, clothes that made me crinkle my face and made me sneer, I think this was called disgust. I then felt the hotness in my head as I looked at the open tab of fashion on tablet. I hated this, hated the world we lived in. I thought came to my mind at the moment. An original thought, and I smiled at it.
People gasped as I walked down the hallway, actually noticing me. Why? I was wearing jeans and a black t-shirt with a band logo. My usual black hair was down in beach curls and I had put dark purple highlights in them. Not sweater and shirts up in a ponytail, for that was the new hit and what everyone else was wearing, but something that was....and I can’t believe I’m saying this, me. Throughout the day, people whispered behind my back, but I didn’t care. I was actually happy for once, and I could feel my smile on my face, could feel myself almost glow. As I got home, my parents didn’t even recognize me. They said I was different then usual. That my attitude went from a casual smile into bouncing with....and they said this....joy! And that was true, for I was finally me and not someone else. As I looked at the jars of emotions that still survived from my cat, who I changed the name to Summer because it was unusual and I was on a role, I opened up each lid, smiling as all the orbs circled around then were absorbed into my soul. I smiled at myself in the mirror, for I had the courage to actually be myself, and the courage to show people the real me. For once, I wasn’t pretending to be someone I wasn’t, like everyone else. I was me, and I was feeling proud of that.