Yesterday

Image of Long Story Short Award - Fall 2020
Image of Poetry
A slow chill
From my head to toes
But I’m immune
Cause it’s like my heart’s already so cold
Cowering in front of what I fear the most
I blindly cover up my eyes
Daring not to look

Every night
I slow down all alone
Just waiting for the promised rest without a fight
Seeing me all undefended-like
All my old thoughts creep up from behind me

I fight for change
I can’t stand it anymore
Even still my heart still sings
Cause

All I say are words without action
I’m more lost than I could ever imagine
Falsely filled with laughter to everyone else
And just like them even I lie to myself
Struggling to look into the face
Desperately trying to keep up the chase
Of yesterday
Good yesterdays

Come back to me
When I could speak without tears taking up space
Contemplating if I should go or stay
As what I first reached out is slipping farther away
My yesterday

And over time
I’m losing sight of
What brought me joy and comfort because

The promises made without being kept
All these hard stones weighing down my chest
Saying that you’ve never thought of leaving me behind
Loosening the memories that kept us all tied
Struggling to look into the face
Desperately trying to keep up the chase
Of yesterday
Easy yesterdays

Come back to me
When I didn’t worry about what to say
Heartbroken to realize I’m never enough
Scared to lose all that I could trust
And innocent love

Barely able to keep a smile on air
All the bad things jealous of this affair
Shot by every word that was said and
Letting all this get to my head
Contemplating if I should go or stay
As what I first reached out for is slipping farther away
My yesterday
Sweet yesterday
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