"Oh Rick, are we really gonna do this? " Morty's one hand covering his mouth, another too anxious to stay still in the air asking the old man in the garage.
"Yeah Morty! We are freaking gonna do this! And I am not Rick... I mean I am but I can't... coz those... those copyright stuffs, Adult Swim won't let this happen! They suck... and they want money... a lot of them... you know... they... the bureaucracy... I don't respect them! Call me Licky, Morty... It's like the way the Japanese calls me, like their mispronounced ‘r' you know? It's... it actually sounds pretty satisfying." Licky, obviously hammered, is typing furiously on a keyboard with few empty bottles on the desk.
"Oh man, geez. I thought they are pretty open to derivative work. Anyways, so do I need to change my name too? Just to play safe." Morty scratches his head with his white little index finger.
"Morty, you little crappy idiot! They won't know we are the characters in Rick and Morty if I am a freaky Licky! Wow! What an unexpected pun for the Obsession, Curry Barker?" Licky does not bother to turn away his sight from the computer.
"Okay... so this Tammy guy, what's the problem with her?" Morty takes a closer look on the computer.
"You know short story dispenser kind of stuff, right? It's basically a device in a university library, you can hand in your little lousy ‘literature' and distribute to people around. I hate literature, though I kinda like the part that everybody should suffer from the trashy, rotten soul of the writers, it is pretty satisfying but emotions translated to words? They are just hormones and chemical reactions inside your body. Come on, rise above, focus on science." Licky is man-explaining to Morty.
"I see, so... what are you doing now?" The delay on the question shows quite a huge suspicion about Licky's behavior.
"Yes, I am looking for this bastard, Morty! This little dream-to-be-a-writer guy, Tammy created a short story with no soul with a sting of shoddy drives me nuts! I am gonna to kill him in every dimension!" Licky is too triggered he has to move around with his arms to dissipate his anger.
"Oh geez, you are killing this guy just for a boring story? You are going overboard." Morty sounds worried.
"Overboard? How about you read it yourself and beg me for your apology." Licky passes the short story slip to Morty.
Morty reads it fast, it's not something taking so long to finish.
"I think it is a touching story, Licky. This guy's grandma died and she shared her genuine feelings. Oh, the writer is living in Hong Kong? Do you remember that we once said we could head there sometimes? It's been a while since our classic Licky and Morty adventure."Morty is so excited that he hop in the air.
"What a taste? Morty. When a story is too bad, you don't praise it, you make it a paper wad and a 3 point shoot straight to the trash can. Though I do miss the good old Hong Kong." Licky's eyelids shut down both eyes.
"Hey! Screw you! I know what I am reading, it is a good work! Tell me the coordinates. I am gonna to talk to this Tammy guy and tell him he is a great writer."Morty grabs the portal gun, ready to create a portal.
"Okayyy... there you go." Licky tunes the coordinates on the portal gun screen.
Morty shoots a green portal out from the iron-made portal gun and one foot is already across the portal. Licky's voice stops him.
"Hey, how about do me a favor? Carry this magnum and finish this Tammy guy before you teleport back." Licky hand a magnum to Morty.
"I will not kill Tammy! But I will carry it just to prove that you are the moron!" Morty yells at Licky and grab the magnum.
With a step out from the other side, it is a dorm room located in Hong Kong Baptist University.
"Oh! This is Hong Kong?" Morty looks around and Tammy sits right in front of him and playing League of Legends.
"Oh! Hi there, you are Tammy?" Morty awkwardly starts the conversation.
"I am." Tammy is surprised by this unexpected arrival.
"Alright... it's Morty. Um... I er... I read your short story... ‘Summer'. I just wanna say it's a brilliant one, you know, I am so sorry about your loss, but great one." Morty keeps a forceful smile to cover his poor social skills.
"Short story... Oh, the one goes to the dispenser? It was more a participation rate stuff. My course professor in charges of this event, what a lame contest by the way, and I really need to get a good grade as my last year, so, you know, I made up one."
"How about your grandma? Is that also the made up part?"
"Apparently a lie. It's so cliche, right? Oh! But the B.O. stuff. That is absolutely true, I still can't get anywhere closer than 1 meter to talk to her." Tammy laughs even louder.
Morty leaves the room with another portal shot and back to the garage.
"Yo my buddy, how's the mutual-understanding tour look like? Wait! Let me guess. That ‘story' is some AI generated garbage, and that garbage touches you. What a shame, Morty. But it's alright buddy, it's all about the bad gene inherited by your dad. I won't blame you, stupidity is like cancer, nothing contagious. You are the moron, and I accept it."Licky leans to Morty and try to cuddle with a mocking attitude.
The trash talk by Licky forms a current of sound, subtle but impossible to ignore. It's like a sprinter, implicitly stirring the negative thoughts inside Morty's head. Non-stopping spiral of hatred becomes intense noise of the background, the world around Morty turns blurry.
"Bloom!" A sharp and whip-like cracking sound pierces everyone's cochlea. All a sudden the background noise disappears, silence resumes. What happen? Morty tilts down his head, realizing the magnum outbursts, while Licky is laying on a pond of blood.
"Oh geez! I am so sorry Licky, I... I didn't mean to do that... Oh geez... What should I do?" Morty throws away the magnum and knees down panicky in front of Licky.
"I knew it Morty... I knew it..." Licky stutters, but this time clearly sober.
"I am so sorry Licky... I... Do you have those crazy science gadgets to seal the bleeding?" Morty stutters with immense amount of anxiety.
"No, not that I don't have them, it's just... I refuse."Licky coughs with difficulty to speak.
"Why? No! Come on! Where are they?" Morty screams loudly to Licky.
"No, not this time. Listen to me... listen to me! Morty! It's ok, Morty. It's ok... Grandpa won't blame you. You are a good kid, Morty. But grandpa has lived long enough, almost forever. Actually... it could be the best ending... I am not a believer of god, heaven... is some kinda asshole concept, but I really hope it exists. No amount of intelligence can replicate your grandma. She... I am neither smart nor stupid enough to acknowledge her death. I made those idiotic clones of her but my stupid mind never really recognizes them as real. I... I am not the smartest person in the universe, but the dumbest one. Morty, grandpa loves you, although I always prank on you, I really fucking adores you. Don't go to other dimension to search for anyone. Stay in here. Live your life. Up and downs, good or bad moments, accept them, don't escape. Trust me, there is no better in any parallel world or dimension. Here and now is the best you could have. Do what you love, enjoy your life..." Licky keeps coughing and unable to continue the speech.
"Remember, don't cry... happy for grandpa... Oh... I guess this... is... it..." Both eyes of Licky closed in slow motion, no more heart beat sustain this old body to function.
Morty knees down on the ground, the cries and screams are too loud to be recorded. At a point of some time, the garage returns silence. Morty carries Licky's body and buries in the back of the yard, strange but the only skill that Licky ever told Morty.
During the dinner, Beth and Jerry asks where is Licky. Morty has nothing to respond, just keep pouring the pasta to his mouth. No one asks again because they all think Licky is going on to some adventures that a random Sunday, he will be back to the garage with all his whining. Only Morty knows, he is not coming back.
