Nicolas Juliam

I can see myself going into my shower, quite happily, whistling. I can also remember that irresistible urge to smoke. The one that comes upon you anywhere, at any time. And you have to obey it.
So ... [+]

I have been clean for approximately 24 days, 10 hours and 37 minutes. I am trying to stick to the straight and narrow. With my head down, my face slightly illuminated, and my phone in my hand.
I ... [+]

Clammy hands. A nasty taste in my mouth. Feeling sick. Head spinning. And the more I think about it, the more it spins. I suddenly feel much worse. I wanted to be first. It’s obvious I should be. ... [+]

I will no longer see life as I did before. All these images continually passing before my eyes. We are the spectators of a film in which we all play the starring role. We know this perfectly well,... [+]