We build our homes
From sailors' bones
A crown conch amplifies their screams
From grooves
... [+]
I often cling too longingly
during hugs,
hold that hand one awkward
(beat)
too long.
Sometimes I disparage myself,
because I like to be reassured
others care.
This world of warmth
and friends
is a strange
one for me.
It lacks the
isolation
and cruelty
I am used to.
There is a safety here.
Sometimes the greatest
gift is an absence of fear.
Unfortunately, even this
absence
sometimes births it.
Do you recognize the fervency
behind my laughter?
The mania behind my jokes?
I worry I do not belong here.
That all those I love will realize
I am not worthy of these
kindnesses.
That,
I am Lucifer.
Become too bold,
striven too hard,
and
must be
flung
off
my
lofty
perch.
I feel certain
that this world is
too full of beauty.
That it's all being used up.
So I will clutch a little more fiercely,
laugh a little more frantically,
sing a little more feverishly,
dance a little more frenetically
these lunar nights.
Each morning I stuff a section
of the sun in my belly.
Lest the Universe snatch the Love away,
replacing it with ashes.